Dating an older man

A lot of women still hesitate to share their real opinion when it comes to dating an older man. While age differences are not uncommon in relationships, dating a man that could be your dad is still seen as a taboo. But does age in a relationship between consenting adults really matter in today’s world? Read on for my personal opinion on dating older guys and why women should follow their intution rather than dated beliefs.

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Dating an older man is still a taboo for many

Not very long ago one of my best friends asked me for my advise. She had met a man who was not only remarkably attractive, but also 20 years older than her. Or in her own words: She went on a date with a guy who could easily be her dad, and she still wasn’t sure what to think about that. What made the situation so difficult to her was that (much to her own surprise) she actually realized that she really liked that man. She previously had no experience with dating an older man and never imagined that she could be attracted to a daddy type, but after several disappointing relationships with younger guys, she decided to finally give it a try.

Dating an older man is still a taboo for many
Dating an older man is still a taboo for many

I could understand her confusion all too well: Not too long ago I had been there myself. Just like her, I felt guilty, almost ashamed of dating an older man. How could I tell my girlfriends that I was dating an older man who could be my dad? Would I ever be able to tell my family that I preferred dating an older man over all the young, gym-fit guys from college? I will share my own experience with the sugar baby community, but first let’s talk about why dating an older man is still somewhat taboo in many societies.

 

Why some people believe dating an older man is wrong

In most societies there seems to be some consensus that the age difference between men and women shouldn’t be too dramatic. While it is not unusual for women to have boyfriends who are a few years older, most women date guys that are more or less around their age. When I first realized that I found older guys attractive, I asked myself why this is the case. I came to the conclusion that our dating behavior largely evolved from societal pressure and the expectations of having a family and raising children.

Why some people believe dating an older man is wrong
Why some people believe dating an older man is wrong

Obviously, if you have children, it is in your best interest to date a partner who will walk this exciting journey with you for as long as possible, and ideally a lifetime. A few generations ago, the expectation of life was much lower than it is today – dating an older man meant that as a woman, you would risk being on your own much sooner than you could afford. However, with modern medicine and so much more freedom in terms of how we can live our own lives, paying too much attention to the age difference becomes somewhat obsolete, at least with regard to the aforementioned reasons.

As you see, a lot of the resistance to the idea of young, attractive women dating older men simply comes from societal pressure and dated societal roles that are no longer relevant to most of us. The bad news is that you cannot change prejudice and conservative convictions that easily. As a sugar baby, you will have to live with the consequences. You may have to deal with family and friends who simply cannot understand why someone your age would want to date an older man.

 

Dating an older man is not that unusual after all

Now you may wonder why someone like me would want to date an older guy if this most likely means having to deal with judgmental people around them? I will tell you what I told my friend Jennifer, and this is my honest opion about dating older men. Having dealt with both younger and older boyfriends and partners I can tell you that mature guys can actually be quite nice as partners. So what are the most common reasons for dating an older man?

  1. An older man is usually more self-confident than his less mature counterparts
  2. He does not act like he has to prove himself anymore
  3. Older guys are more likely to be financially stable and have a successful career
  4. Older men are sexually more experienced and perecptive of a woman’s needs
  5. And most importantly, older men will try much harder to keep an attractive young woman happy

 

Dating an older man is not that unusual after all
Dating an older man is not that unusual after all

Especially for women living in expensive cities like New York or London, dating an older man can make the life significantly easier. The feeling of having somebody who is pretty settled and stable is a bigger relief than you’d think. If you’re looking for both financial and emotional security, a strong, reliable and more mature partner is certainly not the worst that could happen. I personally wouldn’t want to date a young guy who is still struggling to find his place in life and who makes my life more complicated than it already is. Which leads us to a very important point: Financial support.

 

Financial benefits of dating an older man

Financial benefits of dating an older man
Financial benefits of dating an older man

As I have mentioned, dating an older man means living with somebody who is much more likely to have a successful career and a decent income. I really don’t think that money is all that matters in a relationship, but I do have certain standards when it comes to my own lifestyle, and I prefer to have a partner who is on the same page. One thing with successful businessmen is that they’re chronically short on time and often workaholics. The older guys I dated always did their best to compensate by taking me on really amazing dates. For them, the one thing money can’t buy is more freetime, and that’s exactly why they’re not shy of going over-the-top when it comes to enjoying themselves.

Some older men really enjoy pampering their young girlfriends. For a daddy type, it is not uncommon to spoil their company to keep them happy. For example:

  • Daddies usually pay for dinner and drinks on dates
  • Shopping and pricey gifts are standard
  • Sugar babies dating often means you receive a monthly allowance
  • Most of them love to travel with their sugar babies – all expenses covered, of course
  • Some sugar daddies even pay the rent or college tuition of their girlfriends

 

Dating an older man can save you a lot of money

Dating an older man can save you a lot of money
Dating an older man can save you a lot of money

One of the biggest benefits of dating an older man is that you constantly spend less money than you would with a young guy. It is hard to predict how much a sugar baby can expect from dating an older man, but quite often, the financial benefits are substantial. Bear in mind you’re dealing with a generous man who really doesn’t care about money at all. Whatever he is spending on you is most likely just spare change for him.

 

What about sex with older guys?

What about sex with older guys?
What about sex with older guys?

One thing my friend Jennifer was particularly concerned about was having sex with her mature date. What should I say? Yes, the topic sex will come up sooner or later when you’re dating an older man, what do you expect? Sex is important for every healthy relationship, wouldn’t you agree? What a lot of younger women don’t realize: Sex with mature men can be more satisfying! I have to admit, I find young, muscular and sporty guys very hot. However, looks can be deceptive. More often than not, I find that all these self-confident jocks actually don’t know how to really take care of a woman. Generally speaking, I’d say that mature men are less selfish in bed:

  • They have more sexual experience and a better technique
  • They pay more attention to how a woman responds
  • They’re more focussed on making you feel good

 

So your sugar daddy might not be as physically attractive as younger men, there’s no denying that. But looks are not everything: A lot of attraction comes from how somebody acts and treats you. You may discover that sex with an older man can be the better experience for you. In any case, there’s no harm in trying out new things. The more experience you have with men, the more you learn about yourself. Dating an older man means dating a guy who is more sexually experienced, and therefore often more sensitive.

 

Age difference when dating an older man

In my opinion, age ultimately shouldn’t really matter, and I will tell you why. We are so fixated on age and often think that we need to find someone around our age, but what’s the point? In the end, age is only a number, and it has only the meaning you give to it. If dating an older man means you’re with someone you simply like and who can give you what you need, why should you care? Most of the pressure comes from societal expectations and norms, but remember: These norms are other people’s expectations, not yours. All that matters is that you are happy with your life choices. In today’s world, you should’t feel like you have to live up to somebody else’s dated expectations just because you are a woman!

There’s one thing about the age difference you need to know when you’re dating an older man, though. As he usually is quite a few years ahead of you, he is most likely more settled. He has expectations how is life should be like, and most likely, he does not want any complications in his daily routine. as a younger partner, you may have to get used to being a bit more accomodating. It is difficult to come into somebody’s life when he is very used to doing things his way. This does not mean you need to say yes to everything, but inmy experience dating an older man often means to adjust. Remember, it usually pays off really well, so be patient.

 

Overcoming the age difference between sugar daddy and sugar baby

Overcoming the age difference between sugar daddy and sugar baby
Overcoming the age difference between sugar daddy and sugar baby

Age shouldn’t be a big issue if you are open-minded. Mature guys can be very attractive and charming. True, you’re probably still in college. Or maybe you’re in your first job and don’t have ample life experience. Dating an older man shouldn’t be about comparing where you stand in life, though. Your older partner knows and understands your situation, because he has been there when he was younger. Instead of worrying that you’re not experienced or successful enough yet, you should embrace the age difference. Both of you get something from each other. In the most fulfilling relationships, the parties are often not equal, but they complement each other!

Meeting places: Dating an older man is easier than you’d think

Meeting places: dating an older man is is easier than you think
Meeting places: dating an older man is is easier than you think

Have you ever been to a bar and immediately felt all eyes on you as you entered the room? Of course you have! One thing all men have in common is that they can rarely hide it when they check out a girl. Especially older guys are happy to get the attention of a younger, attractive woman. Next time an older man offers you a drink, don’t turn it down: Sit down and have a chat with him, hear what he has to say. He could be more funny and interesting than you expect. When you’re dating an older man for the first time, you might need a while to get used to the idea. My advice is that you should try not to judge a book only by it’s cover. The “contents” might be a lot more interesting compared to the thin, shallow leaflets that most younger guys are.

 

If bars and lounges aren’t your thing, you can always try online dating or dating apps. Nowadays almost all single men are on dating apps simply because it is so easy to get in touch with women. Most dating apps and websites allow you to specifically filter profiles by age, which makes targeting and dating an older man so much easier than aimlessly hanging around in bars and clubs.

Is it easier to meet older men online for dating?

Both online dating and traditional ways of meeting men have their advantages. Meeting guys in a bar is quicker and more straigtfoward in the sense that you immediately see who you are dealing with. Online has the advantage that you can chat with multiple guys at the same time and see who is the best fit your you before you even go on your first date. My suggestion is you give it a try if you’re genuinely intersted in dating an older man.

Sugar Daddies Younger Men
Financial Security Established career and stable lifestyle Usually still struggling to become successful
Sex Often more experienced and sensitive Can be less sensitive and sometimes a bit selfish
Attraction Older men may not be as young and fit anymore, but they often have great sex-appeal, too: Mature guys can be really hot. Definitely the winners when it comes to the body, but is that everything?

In my opinion, women need to finally stop thinking about what others expect from them and what is right or wrong. Whatever feels right to you is right. If you are into dating an older man, go with your gut feeling. If you’re still unsure, you can also seek advice in a sugar babies forum to see what other girls have to say about their experiences. You’re not on this world to live up to expectations that aren’t yours. You are there to live life to the fullest, and you know what you want.